Infertility Tips

   There is a thing called Infertility. And even though I am only 4 months in...I am already getting advice for it. So, to all those women who have been trying for longer or even only 4 months you guys are like my hero's! To fail and try again...you guys are like my models. I know you guys aren't perfect...and trust me I know it is hard to get back on the saddle again....but, still. Oh, this also goes to every woman who has been told that she could never have kids.
   And if by some miracle we conceive this month...I will still spread your message. Anyways onto my rant/ informative post.

I am surrounded by other christian women, who all have children. Don't get me wrong....I love these women very much. But, I do think they are very naive when it comes to the younger generation and things pertaining to TTC women.
  We have a bible study group and it is compiled of mainly older grandmothers, and mid 30 mothers. I am the youngest, which in a way is cool because I can make them see my side. A young wife, early 20's, trying to conceive.
    I hear: "I got pregnant so easily, I got pregnant on our first try, It was so hard being a mother, I can't get a wink of privacy." And I will readily admit that I am jealous. I want what they have. And to be honest, when I hear those things I get defensive and say " I would never complain if I have kids" Which probably isn't true in the slightest.
    But, I am going to be happy at the same time and probably complain as well. The one thing though I do not understand is if you only have one child.....and you try for another one and fail....why do you need to complain about not having another child, when there are so many children that need homes...

And if you are complaining because you have more than 2-3 children....well, truth be told, but, God gave you contraceptives to use. If you don't agree with the pill, there are condoms.

"Just relax it will happen." How are you supposed to do that exactly?
"Tilt your hips after sex" We have been doing that!
"Have sex every other day" Done.
"Don't forget your vitamins!" I have been taking prenatal since October 2012.
"Lose weight, eat healthy, do yoga, try acupuncture, etc." AAH!!!

If you are trying to conceive, know you are not alone. These are a few things that help me:

1. Blog! Blogging has really helped me. Gets your thoughts and rants out there.
2. Keep a journal if you don't like blogging.
3. Another cool thing I am going to start back up is: If you have a video camera, vlog about your baby journey.

4. Do not let sex get boring! I know you want a baby but, try different positions. I know the age old positions are doggy and missionary. But, it only takes one sperm to do the job. Go through the Kama sutra.

5. Have Spontaneous sex! Do both planned and spontaneous. Planning is good for hectically busy couples, but so is random spur of the moment. We do both.

6. Keep the romance alive. I truly believe that cuddling and sex can reach a very high level of intimacy but, add a little romance and you will feel like you were just married. Have a date night at home. And ladies this is a secret but, men like to be romanced too, just in a different way.

7. I know this is hard to do, probably especially if you have suffered a miscarriage..but, I am slowly collecting baby stuff. Clothes, books I would like to read to them, and some stuffed animals, and a few cloth diapers. And my reasoning is that if we don't conceive, we will definitely be adopting as young as we can get, and if that fails I know I can give it to someone it could really use it. And I only buy like 1-2 thrift store outfits per week.

8. Relaxation. I know how hard it is to relax. I don't even think my body knows what it means lol! But, it does help a little bit. If it doesn't help for the baby making process, at least it can help the mind. And this can be done through:
      Reading the Bible and meditating on it
      Taking a bath with bubbles or lavender oils
      I personally do yoga to relax, to help my back, and there is a few fertility yoga moves I do. They help align the hips.

9. Take time for you. If you are sad because you didn't do it this cycle, cry for as long as needed. Let yourself be angry, but, not at yourself or at hubby. Remember you guys are a team. Once you release the emotions....like up to a day....go on with life and think of that as a new cycle. A fresh start. Do not dwell on the past.

10. Do not neglect your husband. He will be sad as well. Remember, your husband is here first. You love your husband first and baby second. Do things together. Not necessarily romantic. Just do a activity he enjoys, bake him cookies, garden if he likes to garden.

11. Do yourself a favor and don't look at things that promise you things. You will get pregnant in your own time. In God's time.

12. Continue taking vitamins, I recommend doing yoga, and fertility massages. If nothing else they feel good and your body will feel better.

Sure hope I helped a little bit.

If you were ever told you could never have kids, if you have a uterus...you can get pregnant. I am reminded of Abraham and Sarah. Just don't give up. God gave us IVF for a reason. And adoption.

Everyone hang tight! Dont give up!

Love, Raven